Inclusivity for All Insights from 5 Disabled Folks on Creating a Warm Welcome During the Holidays
Inclusive Holiday Hosts Insights from 5 Disabled Individuals on Creating an Open and Welcoming Celebration for All
Imagine being at a party with a big, booming family. The kind of family where there are more rolls being passed around the table than there are guests. Well, that’s my family. And when newcomers arrive, it’s like a “previously on” recap to catch them up on our wild storyline. “We’ve got nine kids born within seven years,” they’ll hear. “Lola and Papa eloped because she’s Filipina and he’s Irish,” they might find out. And if they’re lucky, they might even catch a tidbit about me: “Oh, and that’s Kelly, she’s got cerebral palsy… but it’s all good!”
Okay, so maybe that last line is just my imagination. I’m not exactly sure how my family introduces me to outsiders. But what I do notice is how they swoop in to help me at parties. Whether it’s grabbing my plate of food, refilling my drink, or offering me an arm to balance on, they always make sure I feel included. It’s their way of showing small yet steady love, making sure I’m comfortable and enjoying the warm memories we’re creating together.
But not everyone is as lucky as me. Not everyone with a disability gets this kind of thoughtful treatment. So, to help out the newbies in the allyship game, I’ve asked five fellow advocates to share their top tips for making a disabled guest feel welcome at your shindigs.
Tip #1: The Rule of Thumb… and Fingers
“You can absolutely ask if it looks like we might need help with something,” says the fabulous Fin Leary. But hold on a sec, he’s got a golden rule for you: “Politely and casually offer your assistance rather than assuming we always need it.” So, read the room and lend a hand when it’s needed, but don’t go rushing in like a superhero without a cape. And when it comes to small talk, Fin wants you to ditch the “what do you do for a living” question. It’s time to expand those conversational horizons and talk about all sorts of cool things. Let’s keep it interesting for everyone!
Tip #2: The Parking Spot of Dreams
Now, before we even step foot inside the party, we’ve got to tackle the parking situation. Chelsea Bear reminds us to consider reserving a primo parking spot for our disabled guests. Trust me, they’ll appreciate not having to trek across the universe just to join the festivities. And once we’re inside, let’s keep the pathways clear of any obstacles that may send our disabled friends flying. Pets and decorations are great, but let’s give them their own space for now, shall we? Once everyone’s settled, we can release the hounds (and the glitter)!
Tip #3: The Invitation Game
Emily Ladau has an important tip for when you send out those invitations. Ask your guests about any accessibility requirements they might have. Sensory, dietary, physical… you name it! Let’s make sure our party is an inclusive space for everyone. And if you’re not sure whether or not to invite someone because of their disability, here’s the verdict straight from Emily: “Invite them and let them decide.” Simple as that!
Tip #4: Eye-Level Feels
If you know a wheelchair user is joining your dinner party, Angel Powell wants you to pay attention to the little things. Like making sure the table has enough room for them to slide their wheels under. And ensure everyone is seated around the same height, so nobody feels like a towering giant or a tiny elf. Let’s keep the playing field level and the eyes meetin’!
Tip #5: The Text That Says It All
Rebekah Taussig knows the struggle of navigating through homes that aren’t exactly wheelchair-friendly. But a simple text can make all the difference. Reach out to your disabled friends and ask them how you can make your home easier for them to navigate. Send them pics of any obstacles or tricky spots. And hey, if you’re all cooking together in the kitchen, make sure they get in on the action too! Nothing says love like a trusty cutting board and a pile of carrots.
Now, of course, we don’t expect you to become experts in disability etiquette overnight. Learning the ropes takes time. But if you’re willing to put in a little effort, you’ll make your disabled guests feel like they’re savoring the best bite of dessert at your party.
P.S. For more inclusive inspiration, check out these articles: – “How to navigate encounters with disability” – “What it feels like to have autism”
Photography by Dorien Monnens on Unsplash
So, dear readers, what are your thoughts on making disabled guests feel welcome at parties? Any tips or experiences you’d like to share? We’d love to hear from you in the comments below! And don’t forget to follow me on Instagram for more fashionable and fabulous content. Let’s keep the party going! 🎉
