Pregnancy Revelations and Flashlight Tricks
How Did You Form a Deep Connection With Your Baby While Pregnant?
Connecting with Your Baby During Pregnancy
After what felt like an eternity of keeping the biggest secret, I am bursting with joy to finally spill the beans – I am 21 weeks pregnant! Drumroll, please! My husband Max, our mischievous toddler Ella, and I are unbelievably thrilled to welcome another rambunctious cherub to our family.
During this second pregnancy, I’ve discovered a newfound confidence, and have become more prepared to tackle the tumultuous changes that my body is undergoing. Ah, the joys of first-trimester fatigue and the never-ending quest for the loo. But, let me tell you, this glorious ride is filled with surprises!
Now, I’m fully aware that no two pregnancies are identical. So, when peculiar symptoms crept in that I hadn’t experienced during my first go-around, I wasn’t caught off guard. Picture this: a few weeks into my first trimester, I suddenly possessed the superpower of smelling everything within a ten-mile radius. And, to add to the gloriousness, around week eight, my mornings started with a delightful hankering for nectarines and watermelon doused in Tajín.
But amidst all these peculiarities, there was one feeling that caught me off guard – the lack of a strong connection with my baby. Perhaps it’s because my delightful toddler demands every ounce of my free time or maybe it’s because I’m not grappling with the challenges of pregnancy during a global pandemic, when I had all the time in the world to ponder about the miracle unfolding inside me. Or perhaps, it’s simply one of the hilarious side effects of having a second child?
Whatever the reason, what I do know is that instead of obsessing over every millimeter of my baby’s development using my Flo app or devouring birth stories online, I’ve been cruising through this pregnancy on autopilot. The awe and beauty of it all only hit me during those monumental moments, like when I first caught a glimpse of my gummy bear-shaped baby during the ultrasound, and when we discovered the little one’s gender (it’s a boy!). But honestly, I crave those feelings throughout the entire pregnancy, not just during the highlights.
But don’t you worry, my lovely reader, I have a secret weapon to rekindle the connection – the flashlight trick. The first time I stumbled upon this ritual was during my second trimester with Ella. I remember expressing my joy to my mom that I had finally felt Ella’s gentle nudges and flutters. With a mischievous twinkle in her eye, my mom asked me if I had tried the flashlight trick. Perplexed, I followed her into the bathroom, where she brandished a flashlight, turned off the lights, and without further ado, placed the bright beam against my growing belly. And then it happened, within seconds, I felt a rhythmic thud, thud, thud as Ella responded to the light by pushing her tiny body against mine. It was a surreal and emotional experience.
Now, with baby number two, whenever I start feeling detached, I sneakily retreat to the bathroom sanctuary, armed with the trusty flashlight. As the beam dances across my belly, every movement from my little ninja strikes a chord within me, filling my heart with an overwhelming surge of love and gratitude. In those tranquil moments of solitude, I find myself daydreaming of the person he will become, longing to feel his weight in my arms, and showering his adorable, chubby cheeks with kisses.
Alas, my fellow wanderers of the pregnancy realm, fear not, for I am not alone in this sometimes bewildering quest for connection. To gather more insight, I reached out to the wise writer, Catherine Newman, who shared her recollections: “My pregnancies always felt so hypothetical. And given my past experiences with miscarriage, a part of me was always nervous about jinxing everything. However, I decided to serenade the baby with James Taylor songs (and felt a little silly). My husband, on the other hand, enthusiastically read”Goodnight Moon” aloud to the baby (and felt a little silly too). Reflecting back, I realized that there’s no harm in fully embracing the experience because, in reality, you can’t escape grief if it decides to pay you a visit. So, why dampen the joy along the way?”
Now, dear reader, let me introduce you to the delightful illustrator, Ruth Chan, who is currently adorning her own baby bump. Ruth has a unique approach to bonding – she introduces her favorite foods to her little culinary companion. Picture this: as she indulges in a slice of heavenly cake, a plate of cold noodles, or a delectable serving of poutine, she invites her little one to join the gastronomic party. To her delight, her baby sways and dances within, responding to her delicious offerings. Oh, the joy and connection that food can bring!
So, my lovely comrades, aren’t these tips absolutely heartwarming? Being pregnant is a wild, intense, and vulnerable rollercoaster ride, where all sorts of emotions and experiences find their way into our lives. Remember, you are never alone in this awe-inspiring journey.
Now, I’m eager to hear your delightful tales! Did you fall head over heels for your little bun in the oven instantly? Or did you need to perform quirky rituals to forge a connection? Spill the beans, my dear readers – I’m all ears!
P.S. Need some pregnancy wisdom? Check out our articles on transitioning from one child to two and the signs indicating you’re ready to welcome a tiny human into your world!
